Alexander Gemmel / Gamble

This here is the grave o poor Presbyterian freedom fichter, Alexander Gemmel (Eng. Gamble). He wis yin o the wheen wha ris in the rebellion o 1798 in the toon. He niver got daein a big lock an wis hung efter a mockery o a trial. The heid yins mair ir less feelt the need tae mak an example o some boadie sae they tuk Gemmel an his freen an hung them frae the clock tower. If ye want tae gae tae see haes grave, ye wull fin it in the owl Anglican graveyard (they hung him forby!) at the junction atween Queen Street and Church Street. If ye ir staunin lukin at it an jook ower tae yer richt, ye wull see the grave o George Bloody Hutchinson wha wis behin the hingin. A writ this objectively an fairly - dinnae pit nae fleurs on Hutchinsons plot!!

Toon Clock

The pictur here shows Bellymoney Toon Clock. Naethin ower special aboot it ye micht think tae yersel but lake sae much oot roon the Toon, thaurs a lock mair tae it nor meets yer een.

As weel as haein a lang an mixed histry, the clock even sometimes gies ye the richt time (weel, noo an agane it daes). The clock an the buildin nixt it wur built awa bak in 1775 bae the 6th Earl o Antrim (a boadie wha wisnae shoart o a wheen o poun). It wus a hale rake o different things ower the years an wus a market hoose, a coort hoose, the Toon Hall, a schuil and even a plaice o worship. In 1798 it wus pit tae gye bad use whin they tuk poor Presbyterian freedom fichters an hung them frae the clock tower. Their boadies wur jest buried whaur they fell an wirnae fun tae wrkers pittin drains in Main Street come on their banes wha wur then tuk tae the Anglican graveyerd an buried - jest a wheen o graves ower frae the cerrian wha hung them - Bloody Hutchinson!! Tae this dae, naeboadie lakes tae bae seen hingin aboot the clock - onie wunner!!

Volcanic Advice

We ir still bein towl tae watch oot fur thon volcano wha keeps on boakin oot a rake o stour an sennin it oor tae north Antrim - an ither plaices forby. If ye heppen tae bae visitin oor airt whin it taks aff at a rate agane, here's the sayins ye hae tae lissen oot fur:

1. Whits aa that stueugh comin ower the tap o Knocklayde? (Do I detect foreign matter passing over Knocklayde mountain?)

2. Get a sapplin cloot ready fur its aboot tae get gye mouchty! (Prepare a damp cloth to remove impending dust)

3. Maun dear, A hinnae a gasp! (My, it is difficult to breathe!)

4. Wha's them het staines in mae gairden? (What are those hot rocks in my garden?)

5. Fill thon tub an get unther the waater! (Prepare the bath and get into it!)

6. Mae claes haes cocht! (My clothes are ablaze!)

This haes bin a public service announcement frae the Toon.

The Orange Order: A'm sure maist o ye hae heared o the Orange Order but hoo weel dae ye know the histry o it? Weel, it aa begun yin day whin Dan Winter an a wheen o haes freens wur jest sittin aboot yarnin. Aa o a sudden, there wus a ruction ootside the hoose an whin they aa luked oot it wus the left futters shapin at giein Dan an haes freens a guid lickin. Hooinever, Dan wisnae fur haein it sae him an his yins tooled up an stairted shootin at he left futters who got crabbed an shot bak. Efter a while, the left futters taen aff an Dan an them stairted tae think aboot gettin themsels organised in some wye fur fear it micht heppen agane. Sae they stairted wha we noo caa the Orange Order.

It aa went weel fur a brave while but then the Presbyterians an the Anglicans faa'd oot at the toon Twelfth an a hale thra stairted. The Order split and there wus hanlins fur years. Noo thaurs twa Orders but they get on naw sae bad an even spake tae ither whin they're oot.

Dinnae say ye hinnae bin towl aa aboot the Orange Order - ye heared it here furst!

We Love Oor Stanes

If thaurs yin thing wha haes aye stooned fowk frae aa ower the worl, it;s the shape o oor stanes here in north Antrim. A know onie too weel aa the owl jokes aboot rugby players haein funny shaped balls but NAEBOADIE can match oor stanes up here in north Antrim. Fowk come frae aa ower the hale worl tae luk at oor stanes an yins aa seem tae love posin wie them ir even staunin on them. Aye, we're gifted in the stanes department and we're aa gye proud o the grate stanes we hae. Fowk frae ither airts ir jealous o is an wud lake tae tae the stanes aff is but be warned ony o ye wha wud try it - oor stanes ir styin whaur they're at!!

Vote Fur A Clown O yer Choice

Af coorse, in the rin up tae the elecshun, near eneuch ivery telegraph powl had a poster oan it wie some hopeful weerin a fool grin lukin doon on is aa. The poster here seemt tae me tae be the best yin o aa sae whin powlin day come aboot A taen doon the poster an tuk it in wie me tae the powlin station' The wee wummin there towlt me A cudnae vote fur this yin but naw tae fret cas there wus a hale list o ither clowns tae pit mae X at. A done lake shae sed but mine ye, A still think this clown wus the best yin o aa. Mebbe nixt time .....

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